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Ramble, ramble

I've been in a bit of a slump lately. Not sad or depressed or anything, but just not very motivated. I haven't thought of any stories to write lately, for example. I've been playing Guild Wars 2 as usual, but I don't have a goal or anything, so I find myself just kind of going through the motions. I find myself mostly just calling up old fics on my iPad and reading them, and then wondering how the hell did I come up with such good ideas and why can't I do it now? *slaps self across the face* Like I said, not depressed, just blah.


I don't know what brought this to mind, but I remembered an old, unfinished fic that's been languishing in my Google docs for over 1.5 years now. It's a long, chaptered fic that I started and had half-finished when I started writing The Actor - that tells you how long ago it was. I worked on both fics at the same time, writing them on alternate days, until The Actor took off and I devoted my time to it. Since then, I've poked at this one but never really picked it back up again.

I pulled it out over the weekend and read it through, and, well, it's pretty close to done. There's a lot of fleshing out to do, but everything I initially wanted to do in it is written in at least the first draft. There were a couple of extra scenes that I wanted to write, but I'm not sure they would add anything. So, I've decided to return to working on this and hopefully get it done.

The biggest problem with it is that it is so very trope-y. 1.5 years ago puts this right at the beginning of my fanfic life, and you know how it is: that's exactly when a new writer goes, "Oh, I'm going to do a story about this, because no one's ever thought of that before!" Yeah, right.

So, when I finally get this done and start posting, I'm warning you, it's centered on a human OC who discovers she's an arched Time Lady. Yes, yes, it's a bloody tired subject. And as usual, it's me and my chameleon arches (do I ever write stories that aren't related to a chameleon arch?). And it's an OC. Smack me over the head with a large, floppy trout.

As I re-read it yesterday, I realized just how trope-y this story is, how it's everything a fanfic writer shouldn't do. And of course, I agonized about it. I don't know why. I'm just very susceptible to listening to people's advice and taking it to heart. I was looking at this fic, which is over 43k words and 100 pages long, and thinking about just how much work I'd be throwing away if I just abandoned it because it's everything everyone says I shouldn't do.

And you know what? Fuck'em. I like the story. I like chameleon arches, and this probably won't be the last time I use one. People say, "Oh, you're a fanfic writer, so you should be writing about the established characters in the fandom, because they're what make the world and that's what people want to read." Well, first, you already know my opinion about writing what people want to read. But beyond that, yes, Doctor Who has a fifty-year history and hundreds of characters to write about, but the Doctor travels a universe of countless planets and galaxies, of which he's visited quite a lot, meaning that there are potentially millions of people who have been affected by him. Why shouldn't I write about them? Why should I limit my stories to only the places he's traveled to and the people he's met on-screen, or even worse, only the forty-six people who can be counted as companions (TV only; expanded universe brings that number to probably about sixty)?

That's not how I work. I'll write a story about whoever I want to write about. And I'm not going to throw away a story idea that I like simply because it's been done before. And you know what? I really, really hate being pigeonholed as a fanfic writer, being told that fan fiction has only one definition that I have to stick to. I'd love to shed the label of "fanfic writer" so that no one can try to impose these restrictions on me, but I'm not an original writer and there's no label that applies that says, "I just write whatever the bloody hell I want within the framework of the frankly magnificent Doctor Who universe."

So there. Expect me to post a big long fic sometime within the next few weeks (announcing such makes me more likely to actually finish the thing), and picture me posting with a big obnoxious self-satisfied smirk.

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Comments

( 7 comments — Leave a comment )
dm12
Aug. 10th, 2015 11:28 pm (UTC)
Ooh, I'm looking forward to it! Hard work deserves to be finished up and brought to the light of day (or at least posted here for us to enjoy!).
shivver13
Aug. 11th, 2015 04:36 pm (UTC)
It's getting there! I spent a while working on a chapter last night and was rather happy with the level of detail it already had. Some of the other chapters are very bare-boned (when the characters are talking too fast in my head, I write the dialogue down and go back and fill in the details later), so they're going to take a while to fatten up.
a_phoenixdragon
Aug. 11th, 2015 01:44 am (UTC)
I have been in this mood before...and yeah, one does find one's self reading and re-reading older (unfinished) fiction.

And you know what? If you love it and you want to complete it? GO for it! Rock on, sweetie! We'll cheer you on the whole way!

*HUGS*
shivver13
Aug. 11th, 2015 04:52 pm (UTC)
That's what I love about this community here on LJ. We all have different tastes and goals and styles, but everyone is so supportive and accepting. Thank you! :)
flowsoffire
Aug. 12th, 2015 07:35 pm (UTC)
*hugs you*

And you know what? Fuck'em. I like the story. I like chameleon arches, and this probably won't be the last time I use one
So approving of that sentiment.
shivver13
Aug. 13th, 2015 06:16 am (UTC)
Thank you! It takes me a while to get to that point.
flowsoffire
Aug. 13th, 2015 01:20 pm (UTC)
Good you reached it in the end though! ;)
( 7 comments — Leave a comment )

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